Why is it that plans for life never end up the way you want them to? People try and try to obtain (what others would come to think as reasonably obtainable) goals that they set. Whether it’s to go to college and get a good job, have a family with 2.4 kids, dog, and a house with a white picket fence, or to simply just survive in this world with a little bit of the creature comforts. None of this seems to be obtainable for us as we always put too much upon ourselves or are just never satisfied with what we do get!

Then again, I think that there’s a third reason as well. We as people become comfortable and complacent with what we do get, but then there is an unexpected wrench thrown into the system that we’ve perfected for ourselves. This system keeps us going and normally the system that we’ve created is not easy – but it is OUR system. When this wrench is thrown in, we tend to question what we have and complacency is no longer what we want to the point that it doesn’t make sense anymore.

This wrench is the ultimate test of a persons will. Will you drop what you have to obtain the new goal and change your life – will that change be for the better or will it destroy everything that you built and leave you further from any goal that you’ve ever had? Is it worth it? No matter how much you evaluate the situation, you can never seem to find an answer that suffices to what you want to hear.

On one hand you have the possibility of a fresh start sort to speak with the future somewhat open and available. On the other hand you have what you’ve currently built: stability, family, and work. You know life in general as we all come to know it. We know we can’t have both. We know each one can hurt deeply; cut to the bone, tear open your chest, clinch your heart, and squeeze until you can squeeze no longer and the heart bursts from the ache. Only when the blood runs down your arm tickling every hair in it’s path will you know if it was worth it or not.

Most of you are thinking that if that happens then it definitely wasn’t worth it – case closed. Is that really the case though? What if that destruction helps to take the next step, and another decimation takes you to another… only then is it that you find out if it was really worth. If it was, you’ve found what you want to do in life and where it is that you want to be. But if after all of that, all the changes that you make, paths that you now choose to take, what if it doesn’t change a thing, but only makes you see that you’re further back than when you started. Alone, miserable, jaded, and silent. Holding everything at arms length and trying the patients of everyone around you. Completely isolated and now destined to have nothing that you’ve had or wanted and now living to survive; alone and broken.

But what if… what if that off chance that you do call it quits on where your at and make that decision to say “fuck it” and jump that fence to the other side of the pasture. It may not be greener, but there’s a whole hell of a lot more of it. And what if – you see that there’s some breathing room, new possibilities that are obtainable, that you can be happier than what you were and don’t have to be complacent with what you’re used to. That the pain was indeed worth the heart wrenching hurt. The blood that was spilled was was that to fertilize the path you’re walking on.

We seem to no longer live on the “what if” part of life anymore. We’ve become too comfortable with “us” and where we’re going. No longer taking chances and putting ourselves in the hands a fate. I too am ignorantly guilty of this as I haven’t taken a chance on things I’ve wanted to in a very long time.

I’ve become comfortable with what I am giving my children – a person that is, for the most part, content with normalcy. Not a risk taker, but complient with what society says I should have. I want to show them that with risk can come great rewards. With that, I would hope that there would be hurt involved. To show them that no road, whether planned or random, is an easy path to travel.

So, what if? I mean, this wrench looks really interesting in the long run!